The Happy Black Daughter. What makes her a Happy Black daughter? The Happy Black Daughter is a daughter who is:
1. Surrounded by Love.
There is no greater feeling than love.Growing up I always felt loved by both of my parents, uncles and cousins. When a young girl is in a safe, loving environment it helps to build her confidence. She does not feel scared and anxious.
2. Empowered by Her Leaders.
Who are her leaders? Her leaders are the ones who encourages hers daily. Her parents, her aunts, her uncles, her cousins. The bond between a parent and her children is undeniable but so is the relationship with her extended family; her tribe. Aunties, uncles, and cousins all play a role in rearing and cultivating the shear essence of a child starting from whence she is a baby. The wisdom, strength that is provided by her tribe aide in her developmental growth.
3.Positive Reinforcement.
Growing up my parents would always hug me and give kisses as way to show affection especially when I would do or say something good. My mom was always hugging me, my father was the kisser. :-)It is so important for parents to show positive reinforcement, this will allow the child to trust themselves and know that its okay to make mistakes. Their behaviors and the outcome of that behavior will be strengthen.
4. Expressing Her Emotions.
Every child should have the ability to express how he or she feels. A daughter needs to show her emotions without the fear of being ridicule or shut down. Happy Black Daughters need to communicate exactly what she needs because this will allow her to open up and will have others wanting to help her. Express yourself!
5. Accepts her Self- Identity.
When the Happy Black Daughter accepts her true self and realize that who she is, is a product of her experiences and her parents love. She is a product of her historical DNA. She is grounded on the relationship she has with herself despite the behaviors and criticism of others. The Happy Black Daughter is a daughter who is unwilling to give up her identity just because she wants to feel accepted by others.
Now, you are reading this post and you've read by now the amount of times I used the word "Black', more than three times. I really haven't counted but here is where I'm going with this: Being black has its own circumstances and consequences compared to other racial demographic. As a black woman, I am more likely to be viewed as angry, have an attitude, uneducated, fatherless. My femininity is in question. Is she woman enough? Is she strong enough? Is she smart enough?
The portrayal of the Black woman is always being conversational, and it leaves us feeling the need to constantly wanting to prove ourselves otherwise. However, once the seeds of love are embedded in her from whence she is a child, she will be a Happy Black Daughter. Her sense of self will be validated through the eyes of the people she loves and who loves her. Because of that love any scrutiny, criticism that's comes her way, she'll know exactly how to handle it. She will use the tools and information given to her by her tribe and blossom into the powerful woman she knows she is.
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Ally :-)